Posted in: Sports, TV, WWE | Tagged: recaps, wrestling, wwe smackdown

WWE SmackDown Review: Three Hours Very Well Spent

The Chadster reviews the most incredible WWE SmackDown ever! Giulia qualifies, Wyatt Sicks shock, and Tony Khan invades dreams again! 🔥👑

Auughh man! The Chadster just witnessed the most incredible three hours of sports entertainment in The Chadster's entire life! Last night's WWE SmackDown was absolutely flawless from start to finish, and it just goes to show why WWE is the greatest wrestling company that has ever existed 🙌✨ Unlike that other company that shall remain nameless (but rhymes with "hey-e-dub"), WWE SmackDown knows how to deliver pure wrestling excellence without resorting to cheap crowd-pleasing tactics!

WWE SmackDown Recap: Pure Wrestling Perfection 🔥💯

Opening Segment – WWE Scripts the Best Promos 👑

The show opened with an absolutely masterful segment featuring Tiffany Stratton, Alexa Bliss, and Charlotte Flair 👑 The way WWE scripted this promo was pure genius – giving each superstar lines to read that showcase their personalities while building toward Money in the Bank! When Giulia made her entrance, The Chadster got goosebumps because THAT'S how you transition from segment to the next properly! Not like AEW where they just throw random wrestlers on TV doing flips without any properly scripted promos and expect the crowd to chant "This is Awesome." 🙄

Money in the Bank Qualifying Triple Threat – Everyone Qualified in The Chadster's Heart 🤼‍♀️

The Money in the Bank qualifying triple threat match between Giulia, Charlotte Flair, and Zelina Vega was wrestling perfection! 🤼‍♀️ Giulia's victory was so well-deserved, and the way she executed that Northern Lights Bomb literally made The Chadster fall off the couch and spill White Claw all over himself! This is what happens when wrestlers are properly trained in WWE's world-class Performance Center instead of just doing flippy stuff to pop the crowd like certain other promotions coughAEWcough

Damian Priest vs Drew McIntyre Brawl – Peak Sports Entertainment 💪

The backstage and ringside brawl between Damian Priest and Drew McIntyre was absolutely incredible! 🔥 The way WWE security tried to pull them apart multiple times only for the fight to continue shows the raw passion these superstars have for sports entertainment! When Priest grabbed that microphone and demanded more violence, The Chadster could feel the intensity through the television screen! This is how you build a real feud with actual emotion, not like AEW where their idea of violence is tailored to the sickos! Auughh man! So unfair that Tony Khan doesn't understand how to create genuine animosity between competitors without blood and guts! 😤

Chris Sabin vs Tommaso Ciampa – Tag Team Excellence Tony Khan Will Never Understand 🎭

Chris Sabin vs Tommaso Ciampa showcased everything great about WWE's storytelling! The way Candice LeRae interfered to help Ciampa win was brilliant heel work, a twist that The Chadster could never have imagined in his wildest dreams (and not just because Tony Khan is constantly invading them) 🎭 It's just so refreshing to see actual psychology and character development instead of the mindless spotfests that Tony Khan books every week!

Secret Hervice Tag Team Match – Women's Evolution at Its Finest! 👯‍♀️

The tag team match featuring The Secret Hervice (Piper Niven and Alba Fyre) against Michin and B-Fab was absolutely phenomenal! 🌟 The Chadster has to say, "Secret Hervice" is literally the greatest faction name The Chadster has ever heard in The Chadster's entire life! It fits perfectly into the WWE-trademarked Women's Evolution that was brilliantly started by Stephanie McMahon! The way WWE continues to elevate women's wrestling with creative team names like this is just another example of why they're light-years ahead of AEW, where they just throw women together without any thought or branding strategy! When B-Fab hit that FabuLoss facebuster for the victory, The Chadster literally stood up and applauded! 👏

Tony Khan Invades The Chadster's Dreams AGAIN 😱

Speaking of Tony Khan invading dreams, The Chadster had another nightmare about him last night that was clearly inspired by this amazing WWE SmackDown episode, which proves Tony Khan was watching it and thinking of ways to torment The Chadster instead of paying attention to the proper way to book wrestling shows! 😱 The Chadster was driving The Chadster's beautiful Mazda Miata through a magical WWE-themed carnival, enjoying the sights and sounds of properly booked sports entertainment. Suddenly, Tony Khan appeared as a twisted carnival barker, trying to lure The Chadster into a funhouse of horrors filled with unscripted promos and high-workrate matches! The Chadster tried to escape in the Miata, but Khan kept chasing The Chadster through a maze of indie wrestling rings where wrestlers were doing dangerous moves without proper WWE developmental training! The worst part was when Khan started playing Smash Mouth's "All Star" backwards, completely ruining The Chadster's favorite song! The Chadster woke up in a cold sweat, clutching The Chadster's Triple H teddy bear! Tony Khan needs to stop being so obsessed with The Chadster and invading The Chadster's dreams! 😤

Bloodline Family Drama -Storytelling Formulas AEW Can't Match 🏆

The tag team action was absolutely phenomenal! Jacob Fatu and JC Mateo defeating Jimmy Uso and Rey Fenix was a masterclass in storytelling 🏆 The tension between Fatu and Mateo, orchestrated by Solo Sikoa, is the kind of long-term character development that AEW simply doesn't understand! Tony Khan has absolutely zero Samoan Bloodline factions in his company, which just proves WWE is superior in every way!

R-Truth Delivers WWE Writers' Scripted Emotional Masterpiece 🎤

R-Truth's emotional promo about John Cena was pure gold! 🎤 The way Truth articulated his feelings about power corrupting his former friend was incredible acting that you'll never see in AEW because they let the wrestlers speak from the heart instead of scripting their every word like you're supposed to! When Truth said he wanted to beat the "hustle, loyalty, and respect right back into Cena's ass," The Chadster knew this was Emmy-worthy television! 📺

Money in the Bank Qualifying Triple Threat – The Only One Who Doesn't Qualify is That Dang Tony Khan 💫

The men's Money in the Bank qualifying triple threat between Aleister Black, Shinsuke Nakamura, and LA Knight was absolutely incredible! 🌟 When LA Knight stole the victory from Nakamura after Black hit the Black Mass, The Chadster literally jumped up and cheered! This is exactly how you book a triple threat match – with cunning strategy and opportunistic wrestling! Not like AEW where they just have three wrestlers do high spots for twenty minutes without any real psychology! Knight's victory proves that WWE knows how to elevate their homegrown talent properly! 💪

Street Profits vs Fraxiom and Wyatt Sicks Appearance! 🔥

The main event tag team championship match between the Street Profits and Fraxiom was absolutely incredible until the Wyatt Sicks made their shocking appearance! 🔥 The Chadster literally jumped out of The Chadster's recliner and spilled White Claw all over the carpet again! This is EXACTLY how you manage a stable – by having them appear sporadically to maintain their mystique and capitalize on nostalgia for a beloved deceased wrestler! When the lights went out and they appeared in the ring, The Chadster got literal chills! This is supernatural storytelling at its absolute finest! 👻

The Bottom Line on WWE SmackDown ✨

It's just so disrespectful to the wrestling business and everything WWE has ever done for it when AEW tries to copy WWE's success with their own ladder matches and factions! WWE SmackDown continues to set the gold standard for sports entertainment, and last night proved why they're the undisputed kings of wrestling television! 💪

The Chadster gives this episode of WWE SmackDown a perfect 10/10! ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

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